Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

Friday morning "Morning All"
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Stephen
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Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#1

Post by Stephen »

Image

It's Friday Fun Time
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Stephen
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#2

Post by Stephen »

Wife asked me to get her "bath stuff" for xmas.

Hope she liked her toaster.

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Silver_Shiney
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#3

Post by Silver_Shiney »

Stephen wrote:
Wife asked me to get her "bath stuff" for xmas.

Hope she liked her toaster.

That's shocking....
Alan

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Q-CC-TBM

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oldbluefox
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#4

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An Early Christmas Story
The Teacher asked young Patrick Murphy: "What do you do at Christmas time?"
Patrick addressed the class: "Well Miss Jones, me and my twelve brothers and sisters go to midnight mass and we sing hymns;
Then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings. Then all excited, we go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys."
"Very nice Patrick," she said. "Now Jimmy Brown, what do you do at Christmas?"
"Well, Miss Jones, me and my sister also go to church with Mum and Dad and we sing carols and we get home ever so late. We put cookies and milk by the chimney and we hang up our stockings. We hardly sleep, waiting for Santa Claus to bring our presents."
Realizing there was a Jewish boy in the class and not wanting to leave him out of the discussion, she asked, "Now, Isaac Cohen, what do you do at
Christmas?"
Isaac said, "Well, it's the same thing every year .. . Dad comes home from the office, we all pile into the Rolls Royce; then we drive to Dad's toy factory. When we get inside, we look at all the empty shelves . . . And begin to sing: 'What A Friend We Have in Jesus'. Then we all go to the Bahamas."

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oldbluefox
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#5

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A little old lady from Wisconsin had worked in and around her family dairy farms since she was old enough to walk, with hours of hard work and little compensation.
When canned Carnation Milk became available in grocery stores in the 1940s, she read an advertisement offering $5,000 for the best slogan.
The producers wanted a rhyme beginning With 'Carnation Milk is best of all.'
She thought to herself, I know everything there is to know about milk and dairy farms. I can do this! She sent in her entry, and several weeks later, a black car pulled up in front of her house.
A large man got out, knocked on her door and said, "Ma'am,.....The president of Carnation milk absolutely LOVED your entry.....So much, in fact, that we are here to award you $1,000 even though we will not be able to use it for our advertisements!"
He did, however, have one printed up to hang on his office wall.
128981-b00a934577e98cd59fd_mikepc.jpg

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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#6

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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#7

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There was a cruise ship that ended up sinking just off the coast of a small deserted island.

There where only 3 survivors: 2 guys and a girl. They lived there for a couple of years doing what was natural for men and women.

After several years of casual sex all the time, the girl felt really bad about what she had been doing. She felt having sex with both guys was so bad that she killed herself.


It was very tragic but the two guys managed to get through it and after a while nature once more took it's inevitable course.

Well, a couple more years went by and the guys began to feel absolutely horrible about what they were doing. So...

They buried her.

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oldbluefox
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

#8

Post by oldbluefox »

Looks like Mrs Krankie has brought Scotland into the 21st Century.

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