Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

[Stephen]

It's Friday Fun Time


"You treat me like a dog," said my wife....

"We need to sit and talk about it right now," she continued.

"Ok," I replied, "but not on the sofa."

[Stephen]

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[gfwgfw]

Teresa May . . .this week's best joke

[Stephen]

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[Stephen]

To the Scumbag that stole 300 cans of RedBull from my shop,

I don't know how you can sleep at night.

[Happydays]

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is a husband;)

[Stephen]

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[Stephen]

What's four inches long, two inches wide, and drives women crazy?

An empty toilet roll.

[Mervyn and Trish]

Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife.

Tearfully she explained, "It's the pharmacist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone. I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone."

Immediately, the husband drove down town to confront the chemist and demand an apology.

Before he could say more than a word or two, the chemist told him, "Just a minute, listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realise that I'd locked the house with both house and car keys inside and had to break a window to get my keys."

"Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later, when I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tyre."

"When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting for me to open. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, all the time the darn phone was ringing."

He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of coins against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the coins and the phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it. Half of them hit the floor and broke."

"Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer."

"Believe me mister, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her."

[gfwgfw]

The Big Wimborne Minster Folk Festival is at it's best this sun filled weekend

Masses of Morris Dancers . . . . but did you know if the gentleman has been circumcised is not allowed to partake

WHY you may ask . . . .

[Mervyn and Trish]

Go on then. I'll ask....

[Stephen]

I'll bite said........said the Morris dancer

[oldbluefox]

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[oldbluefox]

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[qbman1]

Go on then. I'll ask....

My question is "how do they know?"

[Mervyn and Trish]

Go on then. I'll ask....

My question is "how do they know?"

[Mervyn and Trish]

New security measures introduced on flights to UK

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[Stephen]

You've got some cheek Merv

[qbman1]

Bit of cellulite too, by the look of it !!

[Mervyn and Trish]

I was trying not to look too closely!