Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
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- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Last edited by Stephen on 01 Dec 2017, 08:24, edited 1 time in total.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
BREXIT?
Even now, Pistorius could be out before we are.
Even now, Pistorius could be out before we are.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Husband told his wife, "My new job is having sex live on stage."
She said, "Are you having me on?" He replied, "I'll ask, but so far they've all been thin & pretty"
She said, "Are you having me on?" He replied, "I'll ask, but so far they've all been thin & pretty"
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- Captain
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- Location: Oxfordshire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Oh no you don't !
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- Captain
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Rough neighbourhood !
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- Captain
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Chinese ?!
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- Captain
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Captain
- Posts: 12153
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- Location: Oxfordshire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Hope it contains brussels !
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A woman found herself panicking, when her dog got into trouble whilst swimming in the sea.
A passing German midget saw this and went into action, he brought the dog back to shore and resuscitated it.
The woman, was so grateful, she said Are You A Little Vet, he replied VET, I'm bl**dy Soaked.
A passing German midget saw this and went into action, he brought the dog back to shore and resuscitated it.
The woman, was so grateful, she said Are You A Little Vet, he replied VET, I'm bl**dy Soaked.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing.
If I "had" any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
If I "had" any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his quarterly check-up...
When asked how he was feeling, the 86-year-old replied, “Things are just great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. So what do you think about that Doc?”
The Doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story.
"I have an elderly friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season."
“One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun." "As he neared a lake he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge.
He realized he'd left his gun at home, so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favourite hunting rifle and went 'Bang Bang'."
"Incredibly, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead. Now, what do you think of that?" asked the Doctor.
The 86-year-old thought for a minute and said, " logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."
The Doctor replied, "My point exactly."!
When asked how he was feeling, the 86-year-old replied, “Things are just great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. So what do you think about that Doc?”
The Doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story.
"I have an elderly friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season."
“One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun." "As he neared a lake he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge.
He realized he'd left his gun at home, so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favourite hunting rifle and went 'Bang Bang'."
"Incredibly, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead. Now, what do you think of that?" asked the Doctor.
The 86-year-old thought for a minute and said, " logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."
The Doctor replied, "My point exactly."!
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- Captain
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- Location: Oxfordshire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Captain
- Posts: 12153
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Oxfordshire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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