Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Last edited by Stephen on 22 Dec 2017, 07:58, edited 1 time in total.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I've bought my wife a false leg for Christmas. It's not her main present though. It's just a stocking filler...
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Dear Santa, Please send lots of warm clothes to all the naked ladies on daddy's computer.
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- Captain
- Posts: 11359
- Joined: January 2013
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
-
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I'm that skint I've just opened the door on my advent calendar and a bailiff was stood there.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I said to my wife, "I'm just getting you something small this Christmas." She said, "Ooh, Is it underwear?" I said, "Are you deaf, I said something small."
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Great news for chavs in North Wales this Xmas. Santa Claus is coming to Towyn.
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- Captain
- Posts: 11359
- Joined: January 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Santa is out Christmas Eve delivering gifts. At each house he sneaks down the chimney to make sure everyone is asleep before he comes back down with the sack of goodies. At one house he goes down the chimney and there is a lovely lady sitting on the recliner.
She says "Santa you really ought to stay for a while" .
Santa says" Ho Ho Ho Santas gotta go, gotta get the presents out you know".
Well he goes back up the chimney for the sack of gifts and trips, presents fall all over the roof. He picks them up sticks them back in the sack and goes back down the chimney.
This time the lady is topless and says "Santa you really got to stay a while".
Santa says "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta get these presents out you know".
So back up the chimney he goes, as he walks towards sleigh he sees 1 gift still under the sleigh, so he gets it and goes back down the chimney.
Now this time the lady is totally naked and begins to arouse herself as she once again says "Santa you REALLY ought to stay a while"
Santa looks at her and smiles and says "Hey Hey Hey Santas going to stay, can't get up that chimney with my di*k this way".
She says "Santa you really ought to stay for a while" .
Santa says" Ho Ho Ho Santas gotta go, gotta get the presents out you know".
Well he goes back up the chimney for the sack of gifts and trips, presents fall all over the roof. He picks them up sticks them back in the sack and goes back down the chimney.
This time the lady is topless and says "Santa you really got to stay a while".
Santa says "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta get these presents out you know".
So back up the chimney he goes, as he walks towards sleigh he sees 1 gift still under the sleigh, so he gets it and goes back down the chimney.
Now this time the lady is totally naked and begins to arouse herself as she once again says "Santa you REALLY ought to stay a while"
Santa looks at her and smiles and says "Hey Hey Hey Santas going to stay, can't get up that chimney with my di*k this way".
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11354
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A group of male friends, all turning 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because the waitresses had big breasts and wore mini-skirts.
Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because the waitresses were attractive. The food and service was good and the beer selection was excellent.
Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because there was plenty of parking, they could dine in peace and quiet with no loud music, and it was good value for money.
Ten years later, at age 70, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because the restaurant had no steps and had a toilet for the disabled.
Ten years later, at age 80, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because they had never been there before.
Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because the waitresses were attractive. The food and service was good and the beer selection was excellent.
Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because there was plenty of parking, they could dine in peace and quiet with no loud music, and it was good value for money.
Ten years later, at age 70, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because the restaurant had no steps and had a toilet for the disabled.
Ten years later, at age 80, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons because they had never been there before.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
-
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11354
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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