It's Friday Fun Time
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15963
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15963
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I was in a rough old pub last night.
There was a bloke at the bar, tattoo’s, shaved head, built like a brick sh*t house.
All of a sudden another bloke knocked his drink over. The place went dead quiet, the air was palpable with seething menace.
I thought, “This could turn ugly.” ... and sure enough the cast of ‘Birds of a Feather’ walked in.
There was a bloke at the bar, tattoo’s, shaved head, built like a brick sh*t house.
All of a sudden another bloke knocked his drink over. The place went dead quiet, the air was palpable with seething menace.
I thought, “This could turn ugly.” ... and sure enough the cast of ‘Birds of a Feather’ walked in.
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15963
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15963
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A South Wales bus company says it will withdraw an advertising campaign which shows an attractive semi-naked woman on the back of buses holding a billboard which reads: "Ride me all day for £3".
Local prostitutes complained the advert was misleading as it depicted an unrealistic level of attractiveness and undercut their price by 25%
Local prostitutes complained the advert was misleading as it depicted an unrealistic level of attractiveness and undercut their price by 25%
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Ray B
- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2294
- Joined: January 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A bloke goes to the doctor and says, "Every morning I step out my front door and start walking to work and before I get very far I get what feels like an electric shock from the pavement. The doctor asks ,"How often does this happen"? The bloke says, " It can be anything up to three times on the way there and the same on the way back home". The doctor says, "Don't worry about it, it's just a phase you're going through".
Don't worry, be happy
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Ray Scully
- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2053
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
GEORGE & GOD
An 80-year old man goes for physical. All tests come back with normal results.
The doctor says, "George, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally?
Are you at peace with God?"
George replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when I get in up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom – poof!! - the light goes on.
When I'm done - poof!! - the light goes off."
"Wow, that's incredible," says the doctor.
A little later in the day, the doctor calls George's wife. "Ethel," he says, "George is doing fine, but I had to call you because I'm in awe of his relationship with God.
Is it true that he gets up during the night and poof!! - the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done - poof!! - the light goes off?"
"Oh, my God!" Ethel exclaims, "He's peeing in the fridge again!"
An 80-year old man goes for physical. All tests come back with normal results.
The doctor says, "George, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally?
Are you at peace with God?"
George replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when I get in up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom – poof!! - the light goes on.
When I'm done - poof!! - the light goes off."
"Wow, that's incredible," says the doctor.
A little later in the day, the doctor calls George's wife. "Ethel," he says, "George is doing fine, but I had to call you because I'm in awe of his relationship with God.
Is it true that he gets up during the night and poof!! - the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done - poof!! - the light goes off?"
"Oh, my God!" Ethel exclaims, "He's peeing in the fridge again!"