It's Friday Fun Time
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
An Englishman in Birmingham has been arrested today for impersonating a taxi driver.
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A man boarded a plane with 6 kids.
After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, "Are all of these children yours?"
He replied, "No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."
I Wish I could think so quickly.
After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, "Are all of these children yours?"
He replied, "No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."
I Wish I could think so quickly.
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
My wife asked me to bring home some stuff for the pancakes...
She was fuming when I came back with a wonder bra.
She was fuming when I came back with a wonder bra.
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
An old lady brings her dog to the vet as it seems to be having problems with its hearing.
The vet cleans the dog"s ears and advises her to use hair removal cream on the dog"s ears once a month as a means to reduce build-up and avoid the problem.
The old lady leaves the vet and heads straight to the pharmacist to buy hair removal cream.
The pharmacist says "If you"re using it on your legs, wear a dress for a couple of days to avoid any irritation. If you"re using it on your arm pits, wear a singlet for a couple of days to avoid any irritation. By the way, where are you using the cream?"
"On my schnauser," says the old lady.The pharmacist replies "In that case, I"d avoid riding a bike for the next week."
The vet cleans the dog"s ears and advises her to use hair removal cream on the dog"s ears once a month as a means to reduce build-up and avoid the problem.
The old lady leaves the vet and heads straight to the pharmacist to buy hair removal cream.
The pharmacist says "If you"re using it on your legs, wear a dress for a couple of days to avoid any irritation. If you"re using it on your arm pits, wear a singlet for a couple of days to avoid any irritation. By the way, where are you using the cream?"
"On my schnauser," says the old lady.The pharmacist replies "In that case, I"d avoid riding a bike for the next week."
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Onelife
- Captain
- Posts: 11359
- Joined: January 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Two elderly gentlemen, who had been without sex for several years, decided they needed to visit a cat-house for some tail..... When they arrived, the madam took one look at them and decided she wasn't going to waste any of her girls on these two old men.
So she used "blow-up" dolls instead. She put the dolls in each man's room and left them to their business. After the two men were finished, they started walking home and began to talking. The first man said, "I think the girl I had was dead. She never moved, talked or even groaned... how was it for you?"
The second man replied, "I think mine was a witch. When I nibbled on her breast..... she farted and flew out the window!"
So she used "blow-up" dolls instead. She put the dolls in each man's room and left them to their business. After the two men were finished, they started walking home and began to talking. The first man said, "I think the girl I had was dead. She never moved, talked or even groaned... how was it for you?"
The second man replied, "I think mine was a witch. When I nibbled on her breast..... she farted and flew out the window!"
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15983
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A young pikey girl was sitting chatting to her mum the night before her wedding.
"I'd like to talk to you about your wedding night. Your husband will want to put his prized possession where you pee" said the mum.
"I'm confused mum. Why would he want to put his tarmac rake in the sink?"
"I'd like to talk to you about your wedding night. Your husband will want to put his prized possession where you pee" said the mum.
"I'm confused mum. Why would he want to put his tarmac rake in the sink?"