Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
My blonde wife was doing a competition in a magazine when she asked me, “Babes, do you know the name of the lance St George used to kill the dragon?”
I said, “Ascalon.”
She got up and walked to the front door to go out.
I said, “Now where are you going?”
She said, “Over the road to ask Alan.”
... sometimes I wonder why I bother getting up in the morning.
I said, “Ascalon.”
She got up and walked to the front door to go out.
I said, “Now where are you going?”
She said, “Over the road to ask Alan.”
... sometimes I wonder why I bother getting up in the morning.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Did you hear about the Geordie whose wife asked him to buy a new carpet?
Came back with a Ford Fiesta.
Came back with a Ford Fiesta.
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- Captain
- Posts: 11347
- Joined: January 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbour if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbour. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbour says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbour to take her seat?’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
The Prime Minister has today defended plans to have trainee nurses start off as health care assistants before they start nursing.
This is very acceptable as long as trainee politicians start off as sewer workers before they start talking sh*t.
This is very acceptable as long as trainee politicians start off as sewer workers before they start talking sh*t.
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- First Officer
- Posts: 1854
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Poole Bay, Dorset
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I have been riding this bus to work for 15 years . . .
By heck where did you get on ?
By heck where did you get on ?
Gentle Giant of Cerne Abbas
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Good one Graham
Have a good weekend
Have a good weekend
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- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2053
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- First Officer
- Posts: 1840
- Joined: June 2014
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Where's Stephen?
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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- Commodore
- Posts: 15319
- Joined: February 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
That's not as funny as your usual material. Just saying. .......
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- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2295
- Joined: January 2013