Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
The Psychiatrist told me "You are emotionally retarded with a well below average IQ...
...so I'm prescribing Love Island".
...so I'm prescribing Love Island".
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
I've always fancied having a go at Bell Ringing, so I became a Jehovah's Witness.
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- Deputy Captain
- Posts: 8968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Huddersfield
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
A Democrats prayer:- If Trump is dead before I wake, I pray to God the news aint Fake!
John
Trainee Pensioner since 2000
Trainee Pensioner since 2000
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- Deputy Captain
- Posts: 8968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Huddersfield
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
So, today I went over to the local Gun shop to get a Colt 9mm handgun for home/personal protection. When I was ready to pay for the pistol and ammo, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me."
Making a mental note to complain to the government about gun control wackos running amok, I did just as she had instructed.
When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided I found out she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card reader!
As a senior citizen, I do not get flustered often, but this time it took me a while to get my pants back on.I've been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.
They need to make their instructions to seniors a little more clear.
I still don't think I looked that bad! I just need to wear underwear more often.
Making a mental note to complain to the government about gun control wackos running amok, I did just as she had instructed.
When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided I found out she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card reader!
As a senior citizen, I do not get flustered often, but this time it took me a while to get my pants back on.I've been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.
They need to make their instructions to seniors a little more clear.
I still don't think I looked that bad! I just need to wear underwear more often.
John
Trainee Pensioner since 2000
Trainee Pensioner since 2000
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- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2053
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Lancashire
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
Never in the course of human history has a new Prime Minister told so many lies, to so many, and been voted for by so few!
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
Is it just my pharmacy that can be empty of customers with me the only patient.
I needed one box of tablets (that I've already ordered online a week ago).
I can see them behind her and she looks me straight in the eye and says:
”It’ll be 15 to 20 minutes”.
To put a box in a bag and hand it to me.
I needed one box of tablets (that I've already ordered online a week ago).
I can see them behind her and she looks me straight in the eye and says:
”It’ll be 15 to 20 minutes”.
To put a box in a bag and hand it to me.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
A man came up to me and said "sorry to bother you", I seem to be lost, do you know the Glasgow turn off? "certainly do mate, I replied, "I have been married to her for twenty years.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15980
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Morning All ~~~ :) ~~~
Her dating profile said, “Whacky, 40-ish, loves cosy pubs, and has bubbly personality”. How was I supposed to know that meant, “Unhinged, 49yr-old, alcoholic porker?”