Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Colonel Tom Moore had a flyover above his house yesterday morning.
A bit extreme.
Most would be happy with a road named after them.
A bit extreme.
Most would be happy with a road named after them.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
"I'm looking forward to lockdown ending so that I can take my grandchildren to the park again."
Kylie (17) Glasgow
Kylie (17) Glasgow
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
If you're worried about coronavirus,
Rest assured the pharmaceutical industry is working round the clock to find the most profitable cure.
Rest assured the pharmaceutical industry is working round the clock to find the most profitable cure.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11331
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
The Importance of a Space
A secretary got an expensive brand-named pen as a gift from her boss as a Christmas present.
She sent him a 'Thank you note' by e-mail.
The boss's wife read the e-mail and filed for divorce.
The e-mail said:
"Your penis wonderful and I enjoyed using it last night. It has an extraordinary smooth flow and a firm stroke. I loved its perfect size and grip. Felt like I was in heaven when using it. Thanks a lot."
Moral: A "space" is an essential part of English grammar.
A secretary got an expensive brand-named pen as a gift from her boss as a Christmas present.
She sent him a 'Thank you note' by e-mail.
The boss's wife read the e-mail and filed for divorce.
The e-mail said:
"Your penis wonderful and I enjoyed using it last night. It has an extraordinary smooth flow and a firm stroke. I loved its perfect size and grip. Felt like I was in heaven when using it. Thanks a lot."
Moral: A "space" is an essential part of English grammar.
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11331
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11331
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 13014
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Dorset
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Keep smiling, it's good for your well being
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Topic author - Commodore
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- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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- Senior First Officer
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- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2053
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- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
An oldie but goodie
A chicken farmer went to a local bar... sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perks up and says, "How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!"
"What a coincidence," the farmer says, "This is a special day for me, I'm celebrating."
"This is a special day for me too, I'm also celebrating!" says the woman.
"What a coincidence," says the man.
As they clinked glasses the farmer asked, "What are you celebrating?"
"My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynaecologist told me that I'm pregnant!"
"What a coincidence," says the man .. "I'm a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they're finally laying fertilized eggs."
"That's great!" says the woman, "How did your chickens become fertile?"
"I used a different cock," he replied.
The woman smiled and said, "What a coincidence..."
A chicken farmer went to a local bar... sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perks up and says, "How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!"
"What a coincidence," the farmer says, "This is a special day for me, I'm celebrating."
"This is a special day for me too, I'm also celebrating!" says the woman.
"What a coincidence," says the man.
As they clinked glasses the farmer asked, "What are you celebrating?"
"My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynaecologist told me that I'm pregnant!"
"What a coincidence," says the man .. "I'm a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they're finally laying fertilized eggs."
"That's great!" says the woman, "How did your chickens become fertile?"
"I used a different cock," he replied.
The woman smiled and said, "What a coincidence..."
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
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- Senior Second Officer
- Posts: 680
- Joined: January 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Something for those with a sweet tooth... hopefully it won’t get pulled...
Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a double decker
It was just after eight.
They got off at quality street, and had a drink in mars bar.He asked her name, polo, I’m the one with the hole she said with a wispa.
I’m Marathon the one with the nuts he replied
He touched her cream eggs which was a kinder surprise for her,
Then he slipped his hand into her snickers which made her ripple.
He fondled her jelly babies and she rubbed his tic tacs
Soon they were heart throbs
It was a fab moment as she screamed in Turkish delight
But 3 days later his sherbet dip dab started to itch
Turns out miss rowntree had been with Bertie Bassett and he had allsorts....
Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a double decker
It was just after eight.
They got off at quality street, and had a drink in mars bar.He asked her name, polo, I’m the one with the hole she said with a wispa.
I’m Marathon the one with the nuts he replied
He touched her cream eggs which was a kinder surprise for her,
Then he slipped his hand into her snickers which made her ripple.
He fondled her jelly babies and she rubbed his tic tacs
Soon they were heart throbs
It was a fab moment as she screamed in Turkish delight
But 3 days later his sherbet dip dab started to itch
Turns out miss rowntree had been with Bertie Bassett and he had allsorts....
The pesky scarfaced pirate
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
jacksparrow wrote: ↑01 May 2020, 14:45Something for those with a sweet tooth... hopefully it won’t get pulled...
Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a double decker
It was just after eight.
They got off at quality street, and had a drink in mars bar.He asked her name, polo, I’m the one with the hole she said with a wispa.
I’m Marathon the one with the nuts he replied
He touched her cream eggs which was a kinder surprise for her,
Then he slipped his hand into her snickers which made her ripple.
He fondled her jelly babies and she rubbed his tic tacs
Soon they were heart throbs
It was a fab moment as she screamed in Turkish delight
But 3 days later his sherbet dip dab started to itch
Turns out miss rowntree had been with Bertie Bassett and he had allsorts....
-
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
-
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15968
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)