The final report from DTM
Day 7 - Sailing Home
Due to us seeing the late performance of the show by the brilliant Headliners last night, and my usual fatigue related issues now kicking in big time, we had a lazy lie-in this morning and a late breakfast in Al Fresco. With it being a distinct shade of North Sea grey outside, we quickly fuelled up on a bacon panini each and shot off to the cinema. They were showing a Tom Cruise movie called Oblivion which was very good. It was a bit like Star Wars meets Total Recall (plus 10 minutes of the English Patient), and the best sci-fi movie I've seen in long while. I stayed awake the whole two hours so it must have been good!
Then after Mandy did some brief packing, I treated her to lunch in the same Peninsular Restaurant we've lunched at every day, because I treat that girl like a Princess. Regretfully, we managed to sit within hearing distance (I.e the opposite side of the restaurant) of those two loud ladies from the Flam train the other day, and it was funny to hear them talking about that very trip. They were saying that, of the 30 of us in the railway carriage, everyone else was just miserable, once again completely missing the fact that they were the cause of that misery. It's said that Norway already has one of the highest suicide rates in Europe, but it came damn close to having 28 more that day. God they were dull. And incredibly loud. And in Flam no one hears you (internally) scream. Needless to say, of the 6 people sat with them at lunch today, 5 looked as miserable as sin and the other one was face down in plate of satay sauce, presumably in some kind of nut allergy based cry for help. The Jam Roly Poly was nice though
Then tonight, after a final dinner, and pre/post dinner drinks enjoying pianist Claire in the Crow's Nest, we saw the second of Steve Larkins' (Freddie Mercury) shows, which was great fun again. He really is a showman and clearly passionate about Freddie and Queen. And his delivery is just the right balance of great, Freddie style, vocals and light hearted humour. Mandy especially, really loved it. Oh, and we sat a bit closer to him tonight and can confirm he (thankfully) definitely wears fake teeth, which makes his vocals even more impressive.
So anyway, I best start summing some of this up. Well, it was our 4th time on Oriana and it was a fantastic cruise once again. People always talk about the great atmosphere on Oriana and they are right. Personally, I put it down to the 'his and hers' bathroom cabinets and the increased marital harmony this results in. I think it just keeps the mystery in a relationship when a fella doesn't have to squeeze his shaving foam into just one tiny shared cabinet already bursting with your wife's cosmetic equivalent of smoke, mirrors and industrial strength trimming devices. Of course there's also a nice mix and layout of bars and restaurants on board, a purpose built cinema and a cracking theatre, but no, mostly it's the bathroom cabinets. She's showing her age now obviously, but she's still a lovely ship and always seems to have an excellent crew onboard.
The food in the restaurants has been excellent too. Mandy's dairy free meals have felt a little more restricted this cruise, but then that often depends on the experience and enthusiasm of the head waiter. But it's still a step up on dietary restricted dining shoreside, and Mand says her main courses in particular have been very good. As far as my own, strictly menu based, meals were concerned, and that of our friends Richard and Joyce, there was barely a course we didn't enjoy. They were not perfect by any means, and decent tasting mushrooms and roast potatoes continue to evade them, but overall it was pretty damn good I think.
Entertainment wise, we always love the Headliners and these were possibly the best looking troupe we have had, as I struggled with my usual first night policy of mentally selecting the dancer I would most like in my lifeboat - not in sleazy way you understand, just in a 'in the event of global holocaust/future of human race depends on us' kind of way. But this troupe looked so good, and were so talented that even Jamie, one of the three male singers, entered my thinking at one stage. Seriously though, every Headliners show we saw was terrific, especially Reel to Reel (British movie soundtracks). Steve Larkin, with his Freddie Mercury shows, was equally entertaining. He managed to "do" Freddie in a way where he wasn't so serious you felt he was trying to exactly replicate the unique talent that was Freddie, and not so slapstick that he detracted in any way from a fitting, but funny, tribute.
In terms of itinerary, it was really enjoyable. Having done a similar cruise 3 years ago, this time round we would ideally have liked to visit both Gerainger (sp?) and Flam for the first time, but this itinerary included just the one, and the Flam Railway was well worth it. And we also met our two other objectives of going back to stunning Olden, and meeting our friends in Bergen, so we did well I think. And so amazing is the scenery up here, that we fully expect to be back again, so we'll see Gerainger another time I hope. In fact I would urge everyone to visit the Fjords at least once. Sure, it's unlikely to be bikini weather, and neither do they have much by the likes of Michelangelo or Leonardo (or any of the Mutant Ninja Turtles actually), but it's one of the most beautiful places on earth and it's just a day's sailing away. If you can tear yourself away from cruising to places like the Med, as we eventually did, then you're in for a treat.
So that's me about done I think. I hope it's been of interest and apologies if it got a little wordy, naff or it just turned into a load of drivel at times, but hopefully you got the gist. It almost certainly got a little moany or grumpy at times as my normal fatigue related issues came to the fore, but hopefully you can tell that, overall, we had a real ball and thoroughly enjoyed both the cruise and Norway.
And on that note, it's God Natt from me and it's God Natt from her.
Cheers
DTM
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