Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~

[Stephen]

It's Friday Fun Time

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[Stephen]

WARNING

Partial strong language content

[oldbluefox]

Three ladies are playing the fourth hole at a very private golf club when a naked man wearing a paper bag over his head jumps from the trees and runs across the green. The three ladies stand in awe at the size of his manhood.
The first lady says, 'He is definitely not my husband'.
The second lady gazes at his manhood and says, 'He's not my husband either'!
After a very considered inspection, the third lady finally says,
`He's not even a member of this club'.

[qbman1]

The three wise men are out for a stroll when they come across a stable. The three of them decide to duck inside.

On the way in one of the wise men hits his head on the low entranceway.

"Jesus Christ!" he says.

Joseph says, "Quick, Mary, write that down! It's a hell of a lot better than Clyde!"

[qbman1]

These days about half the stuff In my supermarket trolley says

"For fast relief"

[qbman1]

There were these twin sisters celebrating their hundredth birthdays in St. Luke's Nursing Home and the editor of the local paper
told a photographer to get over there and take the pictures of these 100 year old dears.

One of the twins was hard of hearing and the other could hear quite well.

The photographer asked them to sit on the sofa and the deaf one said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"

He said, "WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!" said the other.

"Now get a little closer together," said the cameraman.

Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"

"HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE." So they wiggled up close to each other.

"Just hold on for a bit longer, I've got to focus a little," said the photographer.

Yet again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"

"HE SAYS HE'S GONNA FOCUS!"

With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH MY GOD - BOTH OF US?"

[Stephen]

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[Stephen]

Standing on an Ikea podium from Sweden, behind bullet proof by Saint Gobain Glass from France, smiling at a 4K Sony Japanese Video camera, speaking into a Dolby Sennheiser German microphone, with vigorous hand gestures giving a glimpse of a Rolex under the cuff made in Switzerland, he patriotically said, "Buy American, Hire American, Stop Immigrants." While standing beside a Slovenian wife.

[Happydays]

WARNING

Partial strong language content

I can't watch it as I'm not on facebook;)

[qbman1]

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[qbman1]

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[Silver_Shiney]

WARNING

Partial strong language content

I can't watch it as I'm not on facebook;)

Neither am i but I was able to start watching it until I gave up through boredom after a minute or so

[qbman1]

I didn't even last that long !

[qbman1]

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[towny44]

HUSBAND DOWN..




A husband and wife are shopping in their local supermarket.
The husband picks up a case of beer and puts it in their cart.
"What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife.
"They're on sale, only $20 for 24 cans" he replies.
"Put them back, we can't afford them" demands the wife.
They carry on shopping.
A few aisles farther on, the woman picks up a $40 jar of face
Cream and puts it in the basket.
"What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband.
"It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of beer and it's half the price."
That's him, on the floor, there in Aisle 5.

[Stephen]

I didn't even last that long !

No sense of humour some people.

[Stephen]

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[qbman1]

Breaking News!!

Crossrail planners admit they may have miscalculated train line proximity to Covent Garden Market

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[qbman1]

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.......and due to a scheduling error, Wednesday has also been moved to Friday