When I left school for a brief period i used to sell security alarms door to door, and I was really quite good at it. If no one was home, I would leave a brochure on their kitchen table.
Police Officer: Now then, your Royal Highness, explain how the accident happened.
Prince Philip: Well, I drove out of the gates and swerved to avoid a pheasant.
Police Officer: You mean you swerved to avoid a peasant.
Prince Philip: Don't be stupid man. Why on earth would I swerve to avoid a peasant?
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