It's Friday Fun Time
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
My new loanshark really does have a heart of gold.
He said if I couldn't make the first payment towards the loan by Thursday night then he would take my whole family out at the weekend!
He said if I couldn't make the first payment towards the loan by Thursday night then he would take my whole family out at the weekend!
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A girl at the nightclub kissed me and whispered, "I want to do doggy style."
I thought, "Where the hell am I going to find a swimming baths that's open this time of night."
I thought, "Where the hell am I going to find a swimming baths that's open this time of night."
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Ray Scully
- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2069
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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towny44
- Deputy Captain
- Posts: 9668
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Huddersfield
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, you're going to smile when you think of this:
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a nice little older lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.
'No, I don't,' she replied.
Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, Then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'
She didn't crack a smile.
'Oh, well.. I tried,' he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
What's so funny?' he asked.
'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'
(Gotta watch those little old women! They may be OLD; they may be slow ... but their minds are always working!)
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a nice little older lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked.
'No, I don't,' she replied.
Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex, and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, Then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.'
She didn't crack a smile.
'Oh, well.. I tried,' he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
What's so funny?' he asked.
'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'
(Gotta watch those little old women! They may be OLD; they may be slow ... but their minds are always working!)
John
Trainee Pensioner since 2000
Trainee Pensioner since 2000
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Men. Examine your own prostate by simply wiping your a*se with Aldi value toilet roll.
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
I walked into Curry's and asked for a chest freezer I said it had to be big enough to hold two dead bodies. So I ordered one and left. When I got home the police were waiting for me,
"Ha, good afternoon officers, " I said, "I do hope you're here about the burglary I reported three weeks ago. "
"Ha, good afternoon officers, " I said, "I do hope you're here about the burglary I reported three weeks ago. "
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Ray Scully
- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2069
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Ray Scully
- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2069
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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