'Thanks, boss!', I said after he called me in for a talk. 'I know I'm a bit thick and I've messed up a few times since I've been here, but this award means the world to me!'
He replied, 'You don't know what a P45 is, do you?'
I went to our new swimming pool today. I tried to have a crafty pee in the deep end but unfortunately the lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in.
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