Top Cruising Tips

[Ray Scully]

Came across this on an American cruise lines FB
a few I liked.

Treat the crew like people and not servants and they will go above and beyond to help you

Don't forget to pack your manners

Always go to the midnight buffet

my best cruising tip is- even if you don't smoke go to the smoking area, great craic and where you meet all the interesting people.

try not to look when the large lady is spreading her towel on the sunbed.

[haveabeer]

My top tip
When you are in a lift stand close to the door so people in wheelchairs can't get in

[barney]

I only have one top tip.

That is, BE NICE !

When you are nice to people, they are generally nice back.
And if they are not, avoid.

Actually I've just thought of another.
Be ready to take the p**s out of habitual moaners.

Quite often it goes over their heads but it's worth the effort, just for your own satisfaction.

[HK phooey]

Invest in a taser and use it on all the old hatched faced passengers that are rude to one's children.

[Manoverboard]

Always mention to your fellow diners the time when you met the Ship's Captain, every evening if at all possible.

[Dark Knight]

I always tell the nosey ones, I am retired, made a fortune and sold up , drive a Bentley and we are having a cheap holiday to pass the time ,as we are bored of shopping in London, Paris and New York and we have let the Italian lakeside villa out to friends for a month

but as always be nice to the crew and be civil to everyone, except those who are muppets...oh and those with screaming unruly kids

[haveabeer]

DK
Is that the kids that are supposed to be in school

Always welcome your dinner guests with how much you paid for and that this will be your hundredth cruise

[Ray Scully]

Complain bitterly that unlike your Princess cruise cards which identifies your loyalty club status, Elite. Your P&O cruise card is the same as they give to the plebs taking their first cruise.

Ray

[Dark Knight]

HAB yes that is correct

Ray
I never tell anyone how much we paid , only that we are having to make do with a suite , as there are no better cabins available and next time we really must try the penthouse on some of the better lines.

[Ray Scully]

HAB yes that is correct

Ray
I never tell anyone how much we paid , only that we are having to make do with a suite , as there are no better cabins available and next time we really must try the penthouse on some of the better lines.

I make it known very early in the cruise that we love our annual P&O cruise "it is such fun and so amusing holidaying with the common people"

Ray

[qbman1]

Invest in a taser and use it on all the old hatched faced passengers that are rude to one's children.

Does that include the children who are completely abandoned by their selfish parents for the duration and allowed to treat the whole ship like their personal playground ?

Yours ever
Hatchet Face

[towny44]

Invest in a taser and use it on all the old hatched faced passengers that are rude to one's children.

Does that include the children who are completely abandoned by their selfish parents for the duration and allowed to treat the whole ship like their personal playground ?

Yours ever
Hatchet Face

Settle down now children.

[HK phooey]

Invest in a taser and use it on all the old hatched faced passengers that are rude to one's children.

Does that include the children who are completely abandoned by their selfish parents for the duration and allowed to treat the whole ship like their personal playground ?

Yours ever
Hatchet Face

I was thinking more of the hatchet faced ones that bark at children 'why aren't you at school' and ignore a polite request for which floor they'd like in the lift and shove them out of the way to press the button themselves.

[The Tinker]

Complain bitterly that unlike your Princess cruise cards which identifies your loyalty club status, Elite. Your P&O cruise card is the same as they give to the plebs taking their first cruise.

Ray

Surely you wear your pin badge they give you, Ray - I could not believe how cheap it looks!!

[haveabeer]

To secure your own 8 place setting table for just the two of you place items on the remaining seats and ignore those wondering around looking for somewhere to sit

[The Tinker]

To secure your own 8 place setting table for just the two of you place items on the remaining seats and ignore those wondering around looking for somewhere to sit

Just tell them you don't play golf and they all magically disappear

[Silver_Shiney]

tell'em you've leased one of the lifeboats from your private yacht to Cunard to rebadge as the QM2....

[haveabeer]

Easier to say in a loud voice i am feeling a bit nauseous where's the nearest toilets works every time for me

[Dark Knight]

telling people the penicillin has kicked in and I am almost cured, works a treat, stops them getting too chummy

[Silver_Shiney]

Easier to say in a loud voice i am feeling a bit nauseous where's the nearest toilets works every time for me

[Frank Manning]

To secure your own 8 place setting table for just the two of you place items on the remaining seats and ignore those wondering around looking for somewhere to sit

Just tell them you don't play golf and they all magically disappear

Or tell them you do play golf and they magically disappear! Or say My brother is a private detective. Or say I'm the head of Tax Fraud Investigation. Or say I wonder why charity shops dont do own label?.........think about it!!

[Onelife]

My top tip is to check your dining times haven’t changed from your first day dining time or you could end up doing what we did to AOTH’s family which was to arrive 15 minutes late for the next three evenings dining.

My wife still hasn’t got over it

Regards

OL

[haveabeer]

Secure your favorite sunbed place towels and a book on the beds plus one either side to allow you space to move then you are safe in the knowledge that you can wonder off come back several hrs later and your favorite bed is still there or just pick up your belongings and go
Repeat next day

[Quizzical Bob]

To secure your own 8 place setting table for just the two of you place items on the remaining seats and ignore those wondering around looking for somewhere to sit

Just tell them you don't play golf and they all magically disappear

Or tell them you do play golf and they magically disappear! Or say My brother is a private detective. Or say I'm the head of Tax Fraud Investigation. Or say I wonder why charity shops dont do own label?.........think about it!!

'We did our own conveyancing' works quite well.

[qbman1]

'We did our own conveyancing' works quite well.

Certainly worked with me QBob !