"Onelife's Pinch an inch diet"

Unread post by **Frank Manning** » 29 Jan 2014, 10:07

Enjoy your cruise Sue

...unlike Jan, I am jealous! My weight can vary by a couple of lbs over 24 hours, but there are so many factors involved, such as how much water I have drunk, the amount of carbs versus protein etc. The fruit crumble with Custard and cream last Sunday put 2lbs on the next morning, but it has all gone and more since then.

Unread post by **Onelife** » 29 Jan 2014, 10:09

[quote="Jan Rosser"]Well done Sue you must be Keefy's star slimmer - have a fab time on your cruise - I'm not a teeny weeny bit jealous

[/quote

Hi Jan,

Didn’t she do well

...look out for Sue appearing on the front cover of Onelifes soon to be launched pinch-an-inch slimming magazine.....

Have a lovely cruise Sue ....but remember " Reduce the grape to keep your shape"

Stay strong pinchers.

Regards

Keith

Unread post by **Stephen** » 29 Jan 2014, 10:28

Onelife wrote:
Stephen wrote:
Onelife wrote:
Hi Maureen,

I can fully understand why you would think there are similarities between me and Stephen as we're both tall and handsome and share similar intrests... apart for the ones he's served time for that is. It would however be amiss of me to take credit for something that isn't of my making...the witty slogans which l think you wll agree have brought a little humour to the pinch-an-inch thread are in fact provided by one of our furom members, who, at this moment in time, wishes to remain anonymous.... probably due to the amount of money he's charging me!!

I would like to take this opportunity to remind Stephen that his rehabilitation programme requires him to refrain from making spurious comments about his victims...especially when they involve Onelife, giver of the finest "low calorie" chocolates

Remember.."too many chips put pounds on hips"5

Stay strong pinchers

Regards

Keith

ADMIN

i want to report the above post and the slanderous remarks made about me, and expect Admin to take action or I shall see lowlife, I mean Onelife in courts.

I have never ever served time. Tea and coffee, yes, but never time. And where he gets the idea he's tall and handsome god only knows. I think he got stitched up by whoever sold him the mirror. I wouldn't say he's short, but he uses a snake for doing pull up's.
Hi Stephen,

Sorry if my earlier comments have caused you distress...l will choose my words a litte more carfully in the future....btw.. l bumped into lce pick, Butterfingers and Mad dog the other day and they asked me to tell you how much they enjoyed your cuppa teas.

Oh, and if you know what's good for you don't go "grassing" to Admin again cus your begining to sound like me...squeak! squeak!

Regards

Your old Adonia ship mate

Onelife

Talk about the pot calling the kettle black when you have a thread titled 'Pinch' and inch. If that isn't blatant criminal advertising I don't know what is

Unread post by **Silver_Shiney** » 29 Jan 2014, 13:18

Last night, I had a small piece of quiche and some salad, followed by home-made, low-fat plain yoghurt with a few blitzed pieces of (drained) peach slices for my dinner.

Then I went to church to do the washing-up for the Alpha supper, and was offered chicken and leek pie with boiled potatoes, chocolate brownies with Madagascan Vanilla custard and several glasses of wine. I didn't touch any of it

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 29 Jan 2014, 13:45

Well done Alan, it's the temptations that are difficult to refuse

Unread post by **Silver_Shiney** » 29 Jan 2014, 13:49

I may well be making up for it on Friday, Jo. My SIL is made redundant then, and we may well be drowning his sorrows.

Unread post by **Onelife** » 29 Jan 2014, 14:01

I can now see a noticeable difference around my midriff, indeed I might need to take my belt in a notch or two by the weekend....then back out again after the party.

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 29 Jan 2014, 14:18

Silver_Shiney wrote:
I may well be making up for it on Friday, Jo. My SIL is made redundant then, and we may well be drowning his sorrows.

Well there are times when there is a good reason for going off the straight and narrow, hope your SIL soon finds other work.

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 29 Jan 2014, 14:25

Onelife wrote:
I can now see a noticeable difference around my midriff, indeed I might need to take my belt in a notch or two by the weekend....then back out again after the party.

Well done to our 'leader'

PARTY !!! are we having a party Keefy you've kept that quiet, it doesn't involve you know who does it

Ooops sorry Stephen, I don't believe a word that is written about you but don't tell Keefy I said that

Unread post by **Stephen** » 29 Jan 2014, 15:23

Onelife wrote:
I can now see a noticeable difference around my midriff, indeed I might need to take my belt in a notch or two by the weekend....then back out again after the party.

Not that old ploy again.

Just don't ask me to adjust it for you. I've only just finished paying for the last lot of therapy

Unread post by **Silver_Shiney** » 29 Jan 2014, 18:18

Dancing Queen wrote:
Silver_Shiney wrote:
I may well be making up for it on Friday, Jo. My SIL is made redundant then, and we may well be drowning his sorrows.
Well there are times when there is a good reason for going off the straight and narrow, hope your SIL soon finds other work.

Thanks, Jo, he's actually going to start a masters degree in September

Unread post by **Andrea S** » 29 Jan 2014, 18:42

SS,Perhaps this will turn out to be a blessing in disguise.
If will still be a difficult day leaving behind something that he thought was secure.
I am sure a drink is

Unread post by **Andrea S** » 29 Jan 2014, 18:44

Oops, I was trying to say a drink will probably be needed and no one should ever be drinking on their own.

Hope things turn out ok.

Unread post by **Silver_Shiney** » 29 Jan 2014, 20:03

Thanks, Andrea.

The MSc is in computing, and he's a genius in that department. It'll just give him qualifications to go with considerable experience, and then he'll be more or less able to write his own pay cheque.

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 30 Jan 2014, 15:29

Tonight .... ITV at 7.30pm

To Diet or not to Diet.

Unread post by **Andrea S** » 30 Jan 2014, 16:01

The kind of programme you watch with a glass in one hand and choccies at your side. ??

It is nice to follow how good everyone is being whilst still having the occasional treat.

Unread post by **Onelife** » 30 Jan 2014, 16:55

Hello Jo,

Appologies for not getting back to you sooner but l've been very busy helping out the old lady from next door who found herself paddling around in water due to a water leak from her upstairs toilet. She's a lovely old lady who worships the ground l walk on....not suprising really when you consider what a giving, kind and honest chap l am....Btw... l've just taken posesion of 3 lovely porcelain figures which l need to move on quickly...Don't suppose you'd be intrested would you?

Now Jo, what's all this nonsence about "you" not believing what keefy has said about Stephen

. Has he been sending you threatening messages? Trust me Jo, l know how intimidating stevelovesleather. com can be, especially when brandashing his bradle.?

As for the "party" l certainly wouldn't disclose the whereabouts or indeed who's party l'll be attending as you wouldn't know who might turn up....Oh! And please tell Stephren l've said that.

Oh yeah, and if you want to remain Keefy's favorite poster ever.....you're going to have to have done a lot of sucking up by the time l return from the party.

Squeak squeak!

Regards

Keefy

You can start now....

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 30 Jan 2014, 17:49

I was told not to mention the letters

As you know you are my very favourite person on the forum as if I would say such a thing unless under duress ...

How am I doing

Unread post by **Kenmo1** » 30 Jan 2014, 20:34

Dancing Queen wrote:
Tonight .... ITV at 7.30pm

To Diet or not to Diet.

I was hoping for more from this programme - we all know we should eat more sensibly and take more exercise but that is easier said than done. Today was supposed to be a dry day and we intended to go out for a long walk. Instead, it was a cold, miserable dank day and, after going shopping, we stayed in the warm and ended up eating chocolate biscuits with hot cups of tea. I think the weather tomorrow is supposed to be worse.

My intentions were good, unfortunately I didn't carry them out.

Maureen.

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 30 Jan 2014, 20:56

So was I Maureen, I watched about 15 minutes of it and realised it wasn't going to get any better so switched off.

Hot tea is good

Chocky biscuits

Unread post by **Onelife** » 30 Jan 2014, 21:25

Dancing Queen wrote:
I was told not to mention the letters

As you know you are my very favourite person on the forum as if I would say such a thing unless under duress ...

How am I doing

Hi Jo,

I didn’t think I could be topped in the sucking up department but you clearly have a lot of potential

I take it my choccies are in the post

Regards

Keefy

Unread post by **Silver_Shiney** » 30 Jan 2014, 22:06

Onelife wrote:

I take it my choccies are in the post

Regards

Keefy

Jang on a minute, I thought you were the one who sent choccies?

Unread post by **Onelife** » 30 Jan 2014, 22:55

Hi Mr Shinny,

Not only do I still give chocolates but I now have a more reliable courier service to deliver them

As you can probably tell from the way Jo has sucked up to me

...I thought it best that she learns a few trick of the trade...after all she won’t get the reputation I’ve built up if she doesn’t start at the bottom and work her way up.... Not an enviable position I grant you, but it does make one smile from time to time?

Regards

Captain Suckie

Unread post by **Silver_Shiney** » 31 Jan 2014, 07:14

well, sir, if you're prepared for the competition! I'd have thought you'd rather hang on to your monopoly....

Unread post by **Dancing Queen** » 31 Jan 2014, 07:31

Onelife wrote:
Dancing Queen wrote:
I was told not to mention the letters

As you know you are my very favourite person on the forum as if I would say such a thing unless under duress ...

How am I doing

Hi Jo,

I didn’t think I could be topped in the sucking up department but you clearly have a lot of potential

I take it my choccies are in the post

Regards

Keefy

Well they would be but in the interest of ensuring you continue to lose those pounds I sent them to your 'not so trim' friend

Clearly you know by that gesture which side of the fence I'm really on.

Luv ( Miss Sucky x )

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