Twisted and bitter thinking

[Ray Scully]

I find it incredible that the the mother of Rachel Manning is blaming Barri White for letting her leave the nightclub after which she was murdered. Has the woman no sense or compassion particularly considering Mr White spent 6 years behind bars for a crime he did not commit. I would hate to feel as bitter as she apparently does.

Ray

[Mo2013]

All this woman will feel is a desperate sadness that her daughter need not have died and it is sad that you cannot understand that. As a mother of a daughter myself, I can understand her absolute devastation. The chap cannot have felt any sense of responsibility towards the girl at all to have 'allowed' her to make her own way home at god knows what time, and he has to live with that forever, but at least he is alive.

[The Monocled Mutineer]

The loss of a child or loved one, child or adult is bad enough. When it is through the wilful actions of another it must be unbearably awful. There must be all kinds of 'what-ifs' that go on in victim's family heads including self-blame - I hope that one day the mother finds peace in her own mind to forgive but never to forget.

The criminal, notwithstanding the taking of another person's life which is an appalling thing to do, especially if willfully (which I presume this was), is all the more heinious given that the criminal has allowed another person to be denied his liberty, reputation and probably a future into middle and old age that he may have aspired to, and for which the criminal presumbly never came forward on in 6 years.

I have not followed this case (nor remember it from years ago), but I trust the judge has sentenced this low-life such that on top of the tariff for any possible consideration of parole that at least 6 years is added to the tariff and that any proceeds from the money, goods or chattels of this low-life are passed equally to all the victims and that Mr White receives compensation that is due from the system that so let him down and reflects loss of liberty, reputation and the means to rebuild his life.

Above all else a good example of why we must NEVER bring the death penalty back.

[oldbluefox]

Whilst we will never know the circumstances of what happened that night girls/women are free to come and go as they please. More often than not there are taxis outside nightclubs to provide safe journey home. I don't know the full details of the case but how often do you see young women opting to walk home. Whilst sympathising with the plight of the girl's mother it is wrong to try and lay the blame where it does not exist. It is the murderer who is the culprit. I feel sure that with hindsight her boyfriend may have done things differently. Unfortunately we never have that option.

[Mo2013]

The parents of Rachel said that she would still be with them today if she had not been abandoned by her boyfriend the night she was attacked, killed and brutally battered, and they cannot forget that. The abandonment is a fact, and it is that fact that they blame him for, nothing else.

[Frank Manning]

As some of you know, our son was unlawfully killed in an 'accident' off Zeebrugge in 1993. Sadness comes over us from time to time especially when we see photos of him and remember good times we had together. However, no one person or organisation was to blame and we decided early on not to give interviews, or to press for charges to be brought, because we would not like to spend the rest of our lives bitterly blaming someone or some people.

I am not saying we are good or saintly people, we certainly aren't, it is a case of self preservation in a way. You have to live life to the full, remember by all means, be sad at times, but dont spoil your own life and the lives of others, with bitterness. You have to learn to laugh again, and luckily our son gave us plenty of cause to laugh at and with him.

[Mo2013]

So sorry to read that Frank. It is a good thing if you can move on but it will be more difficult, if not impossible, for others to do so, but maybe it is worse when a loved one has been murdered and there is a person or someone who is responsible and so there to blame. One can only hope that in the fullness of time Rachel's parents can live without the torment they are going through at the moment.

[Delboy]

Having not read the case only the latest outcome, I personally do not know if the boy friend abandoned her or not.

She appears to have made a decision to go home alone, why she made that decision and what happened between her and her boyfriend that night, I do not know.

The fact that her parents say he abandoned her, does not necessary make it true, they are obviously still feeling a lot of pain, and sometimes this can affect your reasoning. Again I don't know if this is the case in this instance, just my thoughts.

[Dancing Queen]

What a lovely post Frank, I can remember you posting something previously about your son ( I wasn't aware at the time ) but I do recall what a wonderful positive attitude you had then just as you have now.

I don't know about not saying you are good or saintly people but you and your wife sound a pretty special couple to me.

[Frank Manning]

No way Jo! Trust me, its just self preservation. But we do laugh a lot in this house and that is good! Sue's one liners are often amusing to me.

We were in the theatre on Aurora one day, when a very very overweight couple sauntered down one of the side aisles and sat in the front row with a bag on the seat between them. After a few moments the lady reached into the bag, pulled out a book, and handed it to the gentleman.

Sue said "That'll be the Good Food Guide".

[Kenmo1]

No way Jo! Trust me, its just self preservation. But we do laugh a lot in this house and that is good! Sue's one liners are often amusing to me.

We were in the theatre on Aurora one day, when a very very overweight couple sauntered down one of the side aisles and sat in the front row with a bag on the seat between them. After a few moments the lady reached into the bag, pulled out a book, and handed it to the gentleman.

Sue said "That'll be the Good Food Guide".

That made me smile, Frank. Wish I could think of quick replies like that.

[Quizzical Bob]

No way Jo! Trust me, its just self preservation. But we do laugh a lot in this house and that is good! Sue's one liners are often amusing to me.

We were in the theatre on Aurora one day, when a very very overweight couple sauntered down one of the side aisles and sat in the front row with a bag on the seat between them. After a few moments the lady reached into the bag, pulled out a book, and handed it to the gentleman.

Sue said "That'll be the Good Food Guide".

Was it a weighty tome?

[jay-ell71]

Oh Frank, you made me smile too.

How sad it has been for you and how wise you and Mrs Frank have been not to become embittered by what happened. Bless you.

As for the Mother who cannot forgive the boyfriend ...... the way I read it, the young girl took the decision herself to leave the venue. Maybe Barri could have gone after her, but he didn't, and he cannot be castigated for that. He has spent many years in prison for something he did not do, that should be enough.

[Silver_Shiney]

I heard that the couple had had an argument. Perhaps the young lady wanted nothing to do with her boyfriend at that point?

An awful tragedy.

[Frank Manning]

No way Jo! Trust me, its just self preservation. But we do laugh a lot in this house and that is good! Sue's one liners are often amusing to me.

We were in the theatre on Aurora one day, when a very very overweight couple sauntered down one of the side aisles and sat in the front row with a bag on the seat between them. After a few moments the lady reached into the bag, pulled out a book, and handed it to the gentleman.

Sue said "That'll be the Good Food Guide".

That made me smile, Frank. Wish I could think of quick replies like that.

Yes I just love her one liners. Another was when we were young and first married, she asked me for some money, and I said "What happened to the £10 I gave you last week?"

"I frittered it away on non essentials like food!" was the reply.

Those were the days when 10/- would buy a piece of topside for two days.

[Frank Manning]

No way Jo! Trust me, its just self preservation. But we do laugh a lot in this house and that is good! Sue's one liners are often amusing to me.

We were in the theatre on Aurora one day, when a very very overweight couple sauntered down one of the side aisles and sat in the front row with a bag on the seat between them. After a few moments the lady reached into the bag, pulled out a book, and handed it to the gentleman.

Sue said "That'll be the Good Food Guide".

Was it a weighty tome?

One day when the children were small, pre school age, they were playing up a fair bit, the washing machine was chuntering across the kitchen floor, and the vacuum cleaner had just packed up and was making a rattling sound, the door bell rang, and Sue went to the door to find two very sweet ladies offering bible leaflets, with the words "Good morning my dear, are you seeking peace?"

Sue opened the door wider and said "What do you think?" and then shut it again.

[Romig1]

It's an awful story, with lots of upset and harm experienced by many people.

To criticize any of those affected would seem a bit harsh to me. Whilst I don't share the opinion of the mother that Barri White is to blame in any way, I can perhaps understand that it's her grief that makes her think so.

I suspect that Barri White will always be thinking to himself what may of happened had he not left Rachel that night, but that's down to his own concience, knowing the whole facts and background.

[Frank Manning]

It is definitely hard on the parents, and they have suffered a lot with the two trials to sit through. But it was also a hard thing to say about the boy in public, after all he was not guilty, and he was coming back to collect her. Its just circumstanes for the three of them, and evil by the real murderer. The Mum needs to find closure and I am sure she will find it hard, but I dont think she will find it easily while she harbours that grudge.

I would hate to have been a member of the jury which convicted him now. That is not an easy task, and 60 years ago he could have been hung. It doesn't bear thinking about.