Mornin All --- :) ---

[Stephen]

It's Friday Fun Time

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are aiming to go off on honeymoon after their wedding 'for two weeks of living in pampered luxury', followed by a lifetime of
 
........ the same.

[Stephen]

Shamus asked Paddy how he got his black eye.

'You'd never believe it,' said Paddy, 'but I got it in church.'

He said he had been sitting behind a fat lady and when they all stood for a hymn he noticed her dress was creased into the cheeks of her bum.

'All I did was lean forward and pull it out and she turned round and hit me,' said Paddy.

It was a week later and Shamus was surprised to see Paddy had another black eye. 'I got it in church,' he began to explain.

He said he found himself behind the same fat woman and when they stood for the hymn her dress was once again creased into the cheeks of her bum.

'My little nephew reached forward and pulled it out. But I know she didn't like that, so I leaned over and tucked it back!'

[Stephen]

Today on Loose Women:
A group of middle-aged, multi-millionaire women with their own TV show tell us how unfair life is.

[gilly88]

thanks Stephen I had a good chuckle at that one.

[towny44]

Two young businessmen in Florida were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store in the shopping mall. As yet, the store's merchandise wasn't in -- only a few shelves and display racks set up.

One said to the other, "I'll bet that any minute now some senior is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling."

Sure enough, just a moment later, a curious senior gentleman walked up to the window, looked around intensely and rapped on the glass, then in a loud voice asked, "What are you selling here?"

One of the men replied sarcastically, "We're selling ass-holes."
Without skipping a beat, the old timer said, "You must be doing well. Only two left."

Seniors -- don't mess with them. They didn't get old by being stupid!