It's Friday Fun Time
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
BMW death traps: More than 250,000 cars in Britain are at risk of bursting into flames.
Luckily, the fault only appears if the indicators are used.
Luckily, the fault only appears if the indicators are used.
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
At a wine merchant office, the regular wine taster died, and the director quickly started looking for a new one to replace him.
A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position.
The director of the winery wondered how to send him away.
He gave him a glass to drink. The drunk tried it and said: "It's a Muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers. Low grade, but acceptable.”
"That's correct", said the boss.
Another glass.
"It's a cabernet, eight years old, a south-western slope, oak barrels,matured at 8 degrees. Requires three more years for finest results."
"Correct."
A third glass.
''It's a pinot banc champagne, high grade and exclusive,'' said the drunkard calmly .
The director was astonished.
He winked at his secretary, which was secretly suggesting something.
She left the room, and came back in with a glass of urine.
The alcoholic tried it.
”This one is a little bit of a challenge”, said the drunk taking another sip.
"It's a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant - and if I don't get the job, I'll name the father.
He started the next day!
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A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position.
The director of the winery wondered how to send him away.
He gave him a glass to drink. The drunk tried it and said: "It's a Muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers. Low grade, but acceptable.”
"That's correct", said the boss.
Another glass.
"It's a cabernet, eight years old, a south-western slope, oak barrels,matured at 8 degrees. Requires three more years for finest results."
"Correct."
A third glass.
''It's a pinot banc champagne, high grade and exclusive,'' said the drunkard calmly .
The director was astonished.
He winked at his secretary, which was secretly suggesting something.
She left the room, and came back in with a glass of urine.
The alcoholic tried it.
”This one is a little bit of a challenge”, said the drunk taking another sip.
"It's a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant - and if I don't get the job, I'll name the father.
He started the next day!
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
'...Trevor Sorbie, the Queen's hairdresser on an emergency call, parks outside Buckingham Palace with scissors, rollers, brushes and other crimper paraphernalia under his arm, only to be told by one of the Guards, "You can't park here."
Sorbie replies, "But I'm the Queen's Hairdresser. I'm here to do Her Maj's hair."
Eyes still front, the Guard asks, "Have you got a permit?"
"NO!", says Sorbie. "Just cut a bit off the back."
Sorbie replies, "But I'm the Queen's Hairdresser. I'm here to do Her Maj's hair."
Eyes still front, the Guard asks, "Have you got a permit?"
"NO!", says Sorbie. "Just cut a bit off the back."
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Went to buy a jacket earlier. The assistant said, “Sir, would you like to try it on?”
“Sure,” I said. “How about getting yer t*ts out?”
“Sure,” I said. “How about getting yer t*ts out?”
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Mervyn and Trish
- Commodore
- Posts: 17018
- Joined: February 2013
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
A weasel walks into a bar and the barman say, "Wow I've never served a weasel before, what do you want to drink.....?"
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"Pop!" ...goes the weasel!!!!!!
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"Pop!" ...goes the weasel!!!!!!
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)
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Stephen
Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 17755
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down South - The civilised end of the country :)