Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
The terrorists in the Liverpool bomb blast on remembrance Sunday came unstuck by the one thing they could not have predicted.
A scouser with a job.
A scouser with a job.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
'I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here', guest names released.
Followed by a Google meltdown as people look up their names.
Followed by a Google meltdown as people look up their names.
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11343
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- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11343
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Ex Team Member
- Posts: 11343
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Cumbria
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Local artist poses with latest masterpiece
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- Senior First Officer
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- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Senior First Officer
- Posts: 2053
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- Location: Lancashire
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
As a bagpiper, I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who had no family or friends.
The funeral was to be held at a cemetery, in the remote countryside, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were there, eating their lunch, but the hearse was nowhere in sight. I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave, where I saw the vault lid already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, but this was the proper thing to do.
The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch, whilst I played out my heart and soul. As I played the workers began to weep. I played and I played like I'd never played before, from Going Home and The Lord is My Shepherd to Flower of the Scotland. I closed the lengthy session with Amazing Grace and walked to my car.
As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, "Sweet Jeezuz, Mary 'n Joseph, I have never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
The funeral was to be held at a cemetery, in the remote countryside, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were there, eating their lunch, but the hearse was nowhere in sight. I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave, where I saw the vault lid already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, but this was the proper thing to do.
The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch, whilst I played out my heart and soul. As I played the workers began to weep. I played and I played like I'd never played before, from Going Home and The Lord is My Shepherd to Flower of the Scotland. I closed the lengthy session with Amazing Grace and walked to my car.
As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, "Sweet Jeezuz, Mary 'n Joseph, I have never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Ex Team Member
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Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Waiter: Are you ready to order madam?
Customer: My husband is still in the toilet
Waiter: Any idea what he is having?
Customer: He has been a while so I assume he is having a dump.
Customer: My husband is still in the toilet
Waiter: Any idea what he is having?
Customer: He has been a while so I assume he is having a dump.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
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- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
Mental Health Authorities are on standby this weekend as are The Samaritans.
It's bu99er all to do with Seasonal Affect Syndrome. Adele is doing a show on Sunday night on national TV.
It's bu99er all to do with Seasonal Affect Syndrome. Adele is doing a show on Sunday night on national TV.
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Topic author - Commodore
- Posts: 15977
- Joined: January 2013
- Location: Down Souf. The civilised end of the country :)
Re: Mornin All ~~~ :) ~~~
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- Commodore
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